I think I am being played by a three year old. Actually, I don't "think" I am sure of it!
When M2 first left "EL" would cry a lot for him at night. I would go in and comfort her. Sometimes I would let her come in the living room and sit in my lap for a little while. That was all okay with me. I understand when the deployment first goes down a little extra comfort is needed.
She recognized pretty quickly the secret word to cry out was, "Daddy" or better yet, "I want Daddy"! I was willing to give almost anything to not hear her cry for M2 because things were still close to the surface for me and it was causing me heartache. So she started using this EVERYWHERE!
She cried for Daddy at the post office because I took a toy away, she cried for Daddy when we were shopping because she had to sit in the basket, she cried for Daddy when I said no she could not have anymore kefir, she cried for Daddy when I told her she had to finish her meals ... on and on and on I could go!
A few days ago I decided enough was enough! No more caving to her crying Daddy! Yes, she misses her Daddy but no that is not why she is calling his name. She is crying his name because those first few days when those feelings were right on the surface she learned my reaction and the reaction I had then is what she is after now.
So last night when she wanted to sleep in Mommy's bed and I said no, she cried "Daddy" for so long that I thought she would go hoarse, no such luck! She finally settled and I relaxed! I was so excited it worked! Ignoring it worked!
She came into my bedroom about 10 minutes after the crying stopped and said, "Mommy I need to sleep in your bed to keep Daddy's pillow warm for him."!
Jump on in, sweetie ...
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